I am the one who pushes boundaries, you push nothing. Yes, I will push your boundaries as I see fit, as much as I know you can handle, and I will respect your boundaries, because I'm proud of you for having them. I won't play with you if you don't have boundaries, because when you tell me your boundaries, that tells me you respect yourself, and why would I want to have a self-respectless creature anywhere near me? I have no problem in stripping your dignity and identity from you, leaving you as blank as a black and white line drawing of a two-dimensional puddle—if I am so inspired to do so, that is—but how can I possibly rip it out of you when you come to me without self-respect to begin with? How can I test your limits if you don't have any limits? How can I push your boundaries if they are nowhere to be found?
By the way, you will respect my boundaries, you have no other choice. And you are lucky, because this distills your existence to its purest simplicity when you're in my presence. How it works is: I tell you what I expect from you, I tell you what is permissable with me, and you Follow My Instructions. No exceptions. No negotiation. No taunting me to see if I'll get upset enough to really damage you the way you want to be damaged. No pushing me to see if I'll cave in because you just might be the one and only person who will finally get me to cave in and allow you something that you don't deserve and that I don't want. That will never happen, there is no such person, and the person who tries to be that person soon finds that they don't exist at all as far as I'm concerned.
Seriously. It's simple.
Do.
What.
I.
Say.
Because when you do what I say, you will be intrinsically rewarded with the knowledge that you have pleased me, entertained me, respected me, respected the fact that I know what's best for you, that I've listened to you and read you like an open book and know exactly what to do with you. When you do what I say, your existence is not only pure and simple, but you are living the best expression of yourself possible, you are, in fact, fulfilling your destiny in the most efficient, the most pristine, the most exquisite way possible. When you do exactly what I say, and become the best expression of yourself you can become, you have every right to be very, very proud of yourself. After I give you back your pride, that is, having completely stripped it away from you in the first place.
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2 comments:
Great post, Mistress Alex! I read it three times.
Subs that resist or taunt or argue about every little thing drive me nuts. I hate that shit. It's okay if they say, right from the get-go, that they really want to be bullied and made to feel overwhelmed or overpowered. That's fine, and understandable. But when they go at it in a passive-aggressive way, I get tired of it (and them) very quickly.
I want to ask, "If you don't enjoy being submissive and obedient, why are you putting us both through this preposterous charade?"
I went through a phase like that myself--being deliberately willful and recalcitrant--when I was just starting out as a practicing masochist. I got over it quickly. It was wrong-headed and dishonest.
I think that most of the subs who do the behaviors described in your article are conflicted or ashamed of their submissive needs. Furthermore, they project this onto you in the form of hostility (disguised as bratty sass, of course--the "How are you going to make me?" attitude).
Spare me. Who do they think they're kidding? And it's so disrespectful. I have no interest in forcing anyone (though I can pretend to do so, if you ask me nicely and OWN IT). That's abuse. I'm not interested in having an antagonistic relationship with someone just so that they can walk away with their sense of DENIAL in tact ("I was forced! She did what she wanted--this wasn't my idea!" yeah right).
The dudes who fall all over themselves to reassure me that their submissive urges are "a roll reversal" because in their daily lives, they're in charge/dominant/corporate Darth Vader on Space Station Death Star are obnoxious, too. 1) I don't care, and 2) why do you think that you have to justify and explain your sexuality to me? HMMM--maybe because you're ashamed? That's sad, but not my problem. And if you're ashamed, then I wonder what you truly feel about me and what we're doing here! Somehow, i don't think that it's flattering!
No thanks. Go see a good shrink, and come back when you don't hate yourself anymore and are capable of appreciating me.
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